My Life

it's ur choice.

2012-02-10T22:32:00.000-08:00

i really appreciate that u accompany me go buy hp.

u said one sentence that really struck me.

mj doesn't mine letting u copy his notes.

wat u dun understand is this.

it's so hard to express it to u in person.

i am absolutely fine with u copying my notes.

what i mind is u came not prepared.

u dun understand what u're copying.

that is what bothers me.

why i feel that i'm taken for granted is that u din come with prior knowledge and just come to copy my notes.

and this occur 2 days before exam.

who will not get pissed.

if u came with ur notes prepared or at least show that u actually did do some reading. then come and copy my notes to enhance ur notes.

i would actually prefer that than having u copy my notes blindly.

what is the point.

waste ur time and waste my time.

if u came slightly prepared we could discuss things that both of us dun understand like what wenli and i were doing that day.

just wanna tell u i dun mind u copying my notes.

what i meant taking me for granted is u coming to me without knowing anything and then copy my notes without understanding anything is what i really mind.

if u still insist on doing so.

what is the difference with u photocopying my notes and go back read.

or even just photocopying the book?

afterall, my notes are from the book word by word.

there's no point if u dun come with prior reading to the certain topic.

i hope u understand what i am trying to convey here.

if u cannot understand and take it to heart.

then i am sorry.

Acceptance

2012-02-05T20:34:00.000-08:00

i guess it's time to accept the fact that how rotten in a place i am right now..

always complaining that this suck and that suck..

well..

it's time to move on and try to endure the misery of life in the place i am right now..

if i can graduate nicely in this sort of condition..

then i must admit that i'm pretty powerful..lol

it's not easy to enjoy study in this sort of condition..

with a blur future

without a reassurance from anybody..

Lord,

i have faith in You..

i know You put me here for a reason..

i know You must have Your plans for me..

although my future seems pretty blur..

although i might be uncertain about my upcoming days..

although i cannot see where i will be in the next 10 years or even after a graduate..

i have decided to place my faith in You Lord.

if this is Your will..

let it be done.

there are no hopeless people but only hopeless situations.

i might be in a hopeless place, in a hopeless situation right now but what Father said is true...there are no hopeless people.

i pray that i will be the hopeful person that will change the hopeless place and hopeless situation into a hopeful environment.

though it may take 5 years..may it take 10 years..may it take till i'm 40..

i will still put in effort to change things.

Help me Lord.

Amen.

The Real Misery Begins

2012-02-02T03:56:00.002-08:00

in the past, i thought foundation block's timetable was bad..

but hey,

look what we have here..

the upcoming system's timetable is worse!

i have no idea what is the rush..

i strongly feel that when i graduate i will become one of those pariah professionals..

talking about being professional..i'm highly doubting that..

i'm starting to worry about my future..

worried..

what is the purpose of having one system so relaxed yet have the other so packed?

lecturers aren't able to breathe properly and we as students are also facing problem catching up the race..

in the end..both parties will surrender to this nonsense race with unknown origin.

reasons such as the system is fixed like that bla bla are just reasons...

i've became so disappointed to the extend that i dun feel like arguing anymore.

u guys do all the planning and we are there as experiments...as rats...

thank goodness the lecturers are all brilliant and nice and are willing to help..

thank goodness i have such wonderful and helpful friends..

if both reasons above are absent..

i would have left ages ago.

i guess this is the only place whereby i can really pour out all my sorrows.

if the sch were to catch me...

i dunno what to say but to only to accept the fact that we do not have freedom of speech.

that is life..

so how miserable can my life get right now..

HOLIDAY!!

2011-12-26T20:16:00.001-08:00

again!

finally it's holiday again!!

mom just left yesterday with my brother back to Kuching...
met Karen before Christmas eve...
shopped with my mom and brother for the 2 whole day and sleft at 3 am waking up early the next day...
yh's birthday was yesterday....came back late..
droved around sg buloh for the whole morning looking for dimsum but ended up with beef noodle...

did all that within 3 days...

ok la...aint much but darn tiring..

i'm really loving holidays now...

i used to think that it's long and boring but this time was great!!!

really love the feeling of sitting down and relaxing..

life seems so peaceful with music playing from the tv and i'm here surfing the Internet..

how perfect can life get now....=]

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Dreaming..

2011-11-06T19:24:00.000-08:00

goodness...

i think i'm really into yesung and sungmin now...

especially yesung...

i dun understand...

he's not good looking...

not hot...

so thin...

has a big head with a small body but i just like him...

why?!

i wish this feeling hurry goes away cz it's really making me go crazy!!

he has a fantastic voice...

a voice that can really calm myself down...kyu hyun too but yesung is better...=D

even dreamed of going to korea...pretend to be a guy and stay with them for a week then run back to m'sia..that's how crazy i am over them...

i'm a girl who dun buy magazine but just yesterday i bought one cz they have this super junior poster in it...i'm also amazed with myself...THIS HAS TO STOP!

he's not even here and i'm already distracted...

saw a video that he fainted in an award ceremony...supposed to get this award for his solo song"it has to be you" but it was cancelled cz he nearly fainted due to some health problem..i felt heartache...so sad for him...=((

stupid SM entertainment....why do they need to torture their staff like that...

hate them..==

ok...i really want to get over super junior...

i mean...at least get rid of this feeling..it sucks as it's distracting me from going on...

hate it hate it hate it...

but i will be forever a suju's fan....^^

especially yesung...and sungmin (cz he has the same birthday as me..XD)

i liked kyu hyun too bt from my point of view..he has attitude problem...so i only liked his melodious voice...

ok ok...see!

i wasted time to blog about super junior...

ARGH!!!

hurry get over with it...hurry get over with it...

2011-10-30T00:39:00.001-07:00

3 weeks hols are up!

tomorrow i'm going back to uni and guess what...

i vomitted last night...

so there goes my dinner...gosh...

had flu and sorethroat...

what a sick child i am...

looking at the time table....

i wonder...it would be a wonder if i can survive through the hectic life for this system...

goodness..

why is the timetable more and more pack each time..???!!!

whatever...

oh yes...

i'm soooo into yesung and sungmin right now..

ok ok...both aren't good looking...neither are they hot...

but they do have their charms...

i likes yesung 1st cz cz he has this fantastic voice..

gosh!

who can resist him with a wonderful voice...

the moment i heard him singing that solo song....i fell for him immediately...

sungmin...hahhaha...well....i liked him cz he has the same birthday as me...he's cute too...bias...i know i know....=D

have been dreaming to go to korea to meet them and all the fantasy dream...

it reminds me of myself when i'm back to high school...

goodness....!!!

i hope i can get over them soon cz this feeling may be sweet but it sucks too...oh well oh well...

that's all for now..

bye..

Holidays..

2011-10-23T07:31:00.000-07:00

holidays are boring...

friends went to penang but i could not go. oh well..

that's 1st week...in my aunt's place..

my cousins are darn funny ppl...

was chatting with my friend on msn...and both of them just stopped talking and looked at me typing...HAHHA!!

the awkward silence broke us into laughter...HAHAHHAHAH!!!

that was the most epic moment...and they knew that looking at my messages on msn is a wrong thing to do but they did it innocently...hahhaha!!

2nd week..(this week)

everyday went to uni to finish my ssm...

din know i cannot actually "finish" it but need to go again on the 3rd week to make it more perfect..haiz...slow torture indeed..

however, since my lecturer is willing to read i'm willing to go uni too...=]

fair enough...

3rd week..

is yet to come...HHHAHAHAHAHA!!

conclusion..

holidays are boring...

Before He Cheats

2011-10-13T23:16:00.000-07:00

Right now he's probably slow dancing
With a bleached-blond tramp
And she's probably getting frisky
Right now, he's probably buying
Her some fruity little drink
'Cause she can't shoot whiskey

Right now, he's probably up behind her
With a pool stick
Showing her how to shoot a combo
And he don't know

I dug my key into the side
Of his pretty little souped-up 4 wheel drive
Carved my name into his leather seat
I took a Louisville slugger to both head lights
Slashed a hole in all 4 tires
And maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

Right now, she's probably up singing some
White-trash version of Shania karaoke
Right now, she's probably saying, "I'm drunk"
And he's a thinking that he's gonna get lucky

Right now, he's probably dabbing on 3 dollars
Worth of that bathroom Polo
( From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/c/carrie-underwood-lyrics/before-he-cheats-lyrics.html )
Oh and he don't know

That I dug my key into the side
Of his pretty little souped-up 4 wheel drive
Carved my name into his leather seat
I took a Louisville slugger to both head lights
Slashed a hole in all 4 tires
And maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl
'Cause the next time that he cheats
Oh, you know it won't be on me!
No, not on me

'Cause I dug my key into the side
Of his pretty little souped-up 4 wheel drive
Carved my name into his leather seat
I took a Louisville slugger to both head lights
Slashed a hole in all 4 tires
Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats
Oh, maybe next time he'll think before he cheats
Oh, before he cheats
Oh

Disadvantages of drinking coffee, tea and soda

2011-10-11T20:54:00.001-07:00

The following are the main reasons why we should limit drinking coffee and stimulating drinks such as tea, chocolate and soda.

The main culprits in all of these are the caffeine. Here what caffeine does to our body:

1. Caffeine Is Highly Addictive

Like other drugs, caffeine causes a chemical addiction within the brain. Quitting coffee or soda can create withdrawal symptoms – headaches, sleepiness, irritability, anxiety – while the brain’s chemistry readjusts.

2. Caffeine Increases Stress Levels

Drinking four or five cups of coffee a day makes the body act as if it is under constant stress. Combined with additional work pressures, it can increase blood pressure significantly, leading to an increased risk of long-term heart disease, says a US report.

3. Caffeine accelerates Aging and Wrinkles

Caffeine contributes to the decline in production of hormones produced in abundance during youth – DHEA, melatonin, and others – which speeds the aging process. Because caffeine dehydrates the body, skin loses water from its cells, causing wrinkling and sagging.

4. Caffeine Accelerates Bone loss

Caffeine causes the urinary excretion of calcium, magnesium, potassium, iron, and trace minerals, which can lead to osteoporosis.Some women are more likely to be affected by caffeine than others due to genetic factors; however, it seems prudent to recommend that all older women have adequate dietary calcium, and limit caffeine intake to no more than 300 milligrams per day.

5. Caffeine Causes The Mood Swings

Mood disturbances such as anxiety, depression, irritability, and attention disorders are aggravated by chronic caffeine consumption. Rather than increasing mental activity as many caffeine drinkers believe, caffeine actually decreases blood flow to the brain by as much as 30% and negatively impacts memory and mental performance. Mood disturbances may appear after the stimulant effect of caffeine wears off – often about three hours later prompting many to consume more caffeine and they may also appear during the recovery period after quitting caffeine.

6. Caffeine Disturbs Normal Sleep Patterns

Because it is a stimulant, caffeine keeps you awake longer, thereby shortening the amount and the quality of sleep each night, which takes a toll on your level of alertness the next day and overall health. Because of sleep deprivation and fatigue, a person might look to caffeine for a boost, thereby perpetuating the vicious cycle.

Excess caffeine in the body causes anxiety, restlessness, insomnia, headaches, muscle tremors, gatrointestinal problems, diarrhea, nausea and irregular heartbeat.

from...http://zikkir.com/health/83640

The End

2011-10-08T06:06:00.000-07:00

finally, we are through with first year...

i feel so relieved...LOL!

however, honestly...i did bad for my exam..

but..not goign to fret about it cz i know i can make it to 2nd year....=]

the sad part...

haiz..some of my classmates are going to langkawi tomorrow...

u can no idea how badly i wanted to go with them..

parents...

why do i have such strict, overprotective, inconsiderate parents..

disappointment and sadness fills my head and heart...

dun feel like thinking about their crap right now...

i just feel angry that way...

met our juniors...

no comment cz i dun really know them yet...

all the best to them..

pretty sure they can make it through for the 1st year cz they have that smart and nerdy looks..wakakakka~!!!

to end this..

i'm so glad that i've make it through 1st year..

hopefully i will see all my classmates in the 2nd year which will be 3 weeks later...=]

Annoyed

2011-10-05T05:45:00.000-07:00

lately right...

i've realised that i'm easily annoyed with everybody...

the thought of me feeling annoyed makes me annoyed...LOL!

i mean...i hate the thought that i'm annoyed with other ppl but i cannot help it..

i just get annoyed just like that...

also...i've also realised that i'm getting more and more sarcastic with my words...

i tend to shoot ppl naturally...just like that...but somehow it releases my stress...

what a weird way to release stress...not a good one too

i'm really sorry to those whom i've "attacked"..

din mean it...just that stress and pressure...when they are accumulated i'll get annoyed..once i get annoyed easily (mood swing) i tend to communicate sarcastically...

to those who happen to read my post..

i sincerely apologize...

just that i dunno how to do so face to face..

Look at the Bright Side

2011-10-03T19:20:00.000-07:00

everyone is feeling depressed these days..
exams are closer...

times is running out..

not much have been covered...

sleepless nights...

coffee everyday...

damaging the body...

chill ppl...=]

Another Day Closer

2011-10-01T23:10:00.001-07:00

i have decided to stop asking ppl to kill me just because of exam.

instead, i want somebody to come and talk to me.

yh looks as dead as i am right now.

another day has passed..

meaning, i'm a day closer to exam.

i have no idea why but i have totally no confidence in this time's exam.

it's like things are everywhere.

i still do not have an clear idea what the whole thing is about.

i have not felt this lost ever.

LOST...

LOST..

somebody pls help me find my way...

help me find the link..

help me to see the light...

i'm lost..

another memory noted..

2011-09-29T09:12:00.000-07:00

just gonna write my normal life today..

making my blog more like my diary...(it's meant to be like that)

let's start with morning...

the bus was later than usual...

meaning, anusha, ali and myself were late for Dr. Sharjan's class this morning.

He cannot tolerate lateness amongst us...

oh well..not our fault...bus was late...XD

anusha was like head-over-heels over this Indian Maurissian guy...not sure how u spell his race name...LOL!!

she was like so over him for...i dunno...weeks...XD

she just so cute...

to see her face turning sweet at his sight and presence and even conversations about him can't help it but it made me smile and laugh...

anusha really knows how to brighten up my day...XD

i saw him...he's really good looking..

no wonder she's so into him...lalalala....

today i had cramps...

cannot stand throughout the whole lecture this whole day...haiz!

i hate it when the day has to come..

while on the bus on the way back to ss15...

i cannot help it but to notice that a guy has been noticing me or sth..

perhaps i've mixed too much with anusha till i'm quite perasan myself...LOL!!

but whenever i looked up he quickly looked away...

not once, twice but 3 times throughout the whole journey back in the bus.

perhaps he was bored and that by lifting his head up it was a coincidence that he's gaze was at my direction...i dunno...just find the whole situation hilarious...hhahahahahha!!!

that's all for the day..

today's not a pretty bad day but cz of the stupid cramps...the day could be better...=D

gloomy skies

2011-09-25T07:27:00.000-07:00

it is indeed a disappointment i would say..

i can say that...my life...i live for my parents not for me..

i can say that i missed most of my fun time because they disapprove it..

SAM i cant go class trip cz i had to go back Kuching...

now i can't go cz they are scared about the safety bla bla bla...

what do you want from me?

i remembered i went to Kuala Selangor to see fireflies with Christine..

mom found out...scolded me..

fine...i understand cz i din go Malacca with my aunt for my grandmother's anniversary..

problem is..i never attended...and if i go..i'll waste 3 days...

that night..i only wasted that night..

is my life only studying? is that it??

everytime dun let me go anyway..

i am sooo fortunate that 5 ee is around...that they actually bring me around...

if not i'll just be like a retard....a person who studies in kl and everything and dunno the places in kl...what in the world man..

it's not langkawi that i'm so excited about...i mean...of course i do wanna see, play and eat the food in langkawi but the main reason is that i wanna be with my friends...

it's a total different feeling and experience going on a trip...

do you really want me to yell at the phone and act like a jerk and spoilt brad just so that i can go on a class trip?

is that what u guys want from me?

i give in to so many things...

why can't u guys just give in for once for me...

why...

why ..

why?!

i am just so fortunate that i have great friends...

if i were given the choice to turn back the clock...

i would choose to meet them again in life..

i definitely would..

i love my friends...

i just hate the fact that i had to be locked up..all the time..

all the time i had to ask permission...

why can't i be like kim chern...or hy...or jerome...

do you really want me to just rebel like that?

why can't u guys just agree to let me go.

i would feel better...

i'm nearly turning 20...

why are u still treating me like a small girl..

why..

i can feel tears filling up to the brim now..

i'm just so disappointed and sad..

Being a Warden

2011-09-24T08:12:00.000-07:00

today, i attended sunset mass...

surprising right...

it's cz Marcelle asked me to be a warden as they do not have enough helpers..

so i agreed to help her out....

i mean...to help the church out.

it was great...

i mean..i felt great for being able to help the church out again as i used to when i was back in Kuching....

ok..i gotta admit that this is my 1st time being a warden...

darn nervous but since when i was not nervous about doing anything in life?

my hand shook when i was holding i dunno what u call that...

it hit many legs as i go on..

sorry about that!!

kids looked at me and smiled..

i smiled back...

i knew that i loved kids...

but recently...my love grew stronger especially after visitting Dr. Wong's 2nd son's full month's party...

at that time that moment....

kids (eldest only about 5 years old) were running everywhere...

i played with them...

i began to find back the feeling that i had when i played with little Nicky boy...

the feeling of playing with innocent kids...

happy that they are innocent...

being so naive and that they always want ur attention...

i dunno why...but i just felt happy attending to each of them...

perhaps u call that the motherly thing or whatsoever...

i just loved that feeling....

the feeling is exactly the same...but perhaps not as that exciting compared to kids when i served the church today...

i felt that i am somewhere that i belong..

not that i felt left out or anything...just that the sense of belonging strengthen and it gives me the motivation to go to church....

now in old town white coffee...

darn noisy with the football sound and everything...

lalalal...

bye for now...=]

Driving Experience and Gratitude

2011-09-04T09:52:00.000-07:00

fine, after reaching kl, i went to my aunt's place until tonight i finally reached my room..after an hour trying to unpack my stuff, YH suddenly was downstairs saying let's go for mamak..

how to reject when he's just outside the house?

ish ish ish...

so i went...

YH, RJ and Chua went..

had mamak.....chatted...hahhahaha...

it's nice to be back to kl too...

suddenly, YH said...i wanna train ur driving....

oh well....ok lurr.....

i drove Chua's car...

i bet he's shaking right until now....hahahhahah!!!

i can't seem to brake...i mean...i dunno when to brake...

the thing is...i felt that it's not necessary to break but he insisted...not only him...YH too...

ok looo...just break lar...it's their cars anyways...normal to be worried..

we drove in uni cz there were lesser cars...

wow....i was sooo stress in the car...when i felt that i don't have to break it seems that i have to break...get what i mean? lesson for tonight....just break...XD

i bet Chua won't allow me to drive in his car ever again....won't blame him though...=]

after training in Chua's car, YH decided to test my driving skills.

so, i had to switch from auto to manual car.

i was not used to YH's gear...it felt a bit different but then i got the hang of it..

seems that i cannot seem to control the clutch properly and again i dunno when to stop...lallalala...

different car drive differently...cz back in kuching, i drove the wira differently from YH's car...

hence, i gotta try to adjust myself to suit the difference...when i'm starting to get the hang of it...time will just not allow...

it was sooo late...i had to go back to my room and continue unpacking my stuff and prepare for monday's class...

oh well..

i'm soooooooooo happy to have such fantastic and helpful friends...

i really thank the Lord for blessing me with such friends...

helping me in my driving skills...asking me out for mamak when i just reached my room...

i am really grateful..

wonder how life would be without them...i bet it will be very boring...

i'm also blessed with friends from Kuching...

the feeling is a total different thing...

my friends from Kuching can never replace my friends from KL and vice versa....

both are equally important.

Alleluia!!

apart from that, i wanna thank the Lord for blessing me with such supportive family members...

mom who brings me around, brother who keeps on talking to me and father who cares about me..

i also thank the Lord for blessing me with awesome relatives...

my aunt, uncle and cousins really took good care of me...

brought me around, eat, play.

they will not leave me out in anything good...

and to all my aunts who supports me morally...cooked awesome food for me scared i'll be hungry or sth...=]

i really love both my family and relatives...

Praise the Lord!

Alleluia!

Hols in Kuching

2011-09-04T09:40:00.000-07:00

ok fine...i gotta admit that i'm writing this when i'm finally back into my room but i just gotta express myself before class starts in another 9 hours time...LOL!!

i finally got back to kuching..

the feeling was great!!

mom didn't dare to sit beside me while i was practicing my driving skills. hence, i gotta wait till my dad comes back from work to help me in my training.

i managed to practice twice. sad case.

for the 1st time i drove, i mati engine at least 5 times.

that was how bad my driving skills were...hehehehe

i went out with karen, mal, mel and sharon to the spring to sing k.

the experience was just awesome!!

of course, mel got annoyed at me cz i simply screamed and sang...muahahhaha!! sorry pal..XD

what else...

hmmm..

oh ya!!

i went to Hnee's house with karen...cz she couldn't make it for the gathering on the following day due to camp..

she, the same as ever, cute and pretty...XD

when we reached her house, she just got back from jogging with her mom....rajinnya...hahahhahaha!!!

we chatted, but most of the time we spent time looking at photos taken in Canada by Karen..

full of flowers i'd say...nice experience...XD

after that we took pics with each other till my mom came....crazy girls!! XD

another experience in kuching was i attended the opening of giant in kuching with my mom...

nth special...just that it's the 1st giant in kuching...so yea...lots of ppl....lallala...XD XD

finally, here comes tuesday...

it was some sort of 5S5 gathering...

i really loved it!

i ate in secret recipe cz it was raining and none of the shops were opened...

who came??? hmmm...

karen, sharon and her bf, amy, aaron chia, chien, bian, hy, roger, kok ann....that's about it...

we chatted and joked...the atmosphere was just amazing...

we missed each other...

amazed at how many of them changed yet din change much....hahahaha!!

wished there were more of this sort of gathering...HAHHAHAHA!!!

Aside from that, there was a day whereby i played badminton with karen, amy, mal and karen's mom...

wow!!!

i wanna play again..

fun fun fun yay!! XD

that's about it...

hope to get back soon..XD

Guardian Angels

2011-08-24T00:16:00.000-07:00

i was reading this book, "God's Angel" and i loved it.

all these while, i knew that each of us has an angel protecting us from harm and danger and i somehow knew my guardian angel's name - St Gary

but after reading a few pages of the book, i knew that my knowledge of them is as shallow as anything.

our guardian angels are always there to keep a look out for us.

the moment we are conceived in our mother's womb, a guardian angel will be assigned by our Almighty God to take care of us. the wonders of God!

Alleluia!

in the book as far as i've read, there were examples on how the guardian angel protected us.

there was this mother in world war 2 who lost her son.

got so worried and wrote a letter to her son.

however, as she din know where is her son all she did was to put her son's name on the letter.

before falling off to sleep, she prayed hard and cried to her guardian angel.

the next day, the letter was gone!

15 days later, her son replied her saying that he was safe.

the miracles of God....^^

another example,

there was this guy who believed and always talked to his guardian angel.

one day he fell down from somewhere high with another 2 of his friends.

he was scared but immediately remembered his guardian angel and shouted, "my dear angel, help me!"

one guy died immediately on the spot, the other died on the way to the hospital.

miraculousness, he was safe.

when he landed on the ground, he got up immediately and ran to repair the faulty sth sth that caused them to fall.

these two examples struck me at how God really tried to take care of us and protect us from harm and danger.

then, you guys must be wondering, why are there still accidents, evil and death?

i do wonder too until i've reach to a page explaining it all.

we aferall possessed a free body..

hence, the final decision lies on us.

our guardian angels will be there to guide us but if we refused to accept or listen to their advice and calling, that will be the time that evil will take over and conquer us.

how to listen to them then since they are free spirits without a corporal form?

prayers are the answer to all....=]

if you think you've prayed enough, then it's clearly that you have not done so.

dont forget to praise and give thanks to your guardian angels as nobody likes to be forgotten.

keep in touch always in prayers, songs, praise and worship....=]

will update more after reading finish the book...XD

insignificance..

2011-08-11T02:04:00.000-07:00

my heart nearly collapsed when i heard that exam is not going to be on Wednesday but to be on Thursday instead...

i was like...NOooooo...

how is this even possible???

how on earth is that even possible??

ppl are happy but i'm clearly am unhappy with it..

of course..

having it on Tuesday is not logical but having it on Thurs...

omg...i feel like crying..

i din even bother to look who raise their hands for Thurs..

i just covered my eyes...

it seems like the day is getting pretty gloomy for my cloudy mood.

but fortunately my class don't mind having it a bit earlier instead to have it as late as possible.

and many thanks to yh for offering to send me to the airport...

and touched that wenli has the thought of tagging along to send me off...

if this keeps going on...

i won't be able to go back home at all..

i won't dare to even book my tickets anymore...

who would anyways?

insignificant me will just sit in the corner of the class to self pity..

Focus

2011-08-07T04:21:00.000-07:00

today in church...

during Father's sermon...

He made me realise one thing...

Focus...

it's the main idea for today...

Father mentioned that....we need to focus in things we do..

if not we will be like Peter, who was able to walk on the water to Jesus but sinked just because he lost faith and focus...

1. couples need to focus in their relationship.

2. couples need to focus in their marriage.

3. parents need to focus on their children and vice versa.

4. Father once has chosen the priesthood need to focus on his calling.

lately...

i've realised that i've lost my focus in everything..

what i meant was i cannot seem to focus in doing one thing properly..

i have no idea what has happened and what is happening..

friends are saying that i'm being emo lately..

i don't think so but perhaps there are some truth in it.

problems seem to be everywhere yet when u really think about it there dont seem to be any problem at all....

perhaps i think and stress too much to have this outcome..

hope CA will hurry come and go...=]

went to see fireflies with Christine last night..

it was awesome...

the beach was nice and i made new awesome friends...

blessed indeed by the Lord...=]

but i know my mood changed again after my mom called and clarified clearly that she wasn't happy and it made Christine feel bad and guilty..

Christine, i just wanna tell u that i don't blame u so don't feel bad..

today after mass...

i made a lot of new friends...

juniors mainly though

HAHAHAH!!

rather surprised that they thought i'm still doing pre u...heheheheh...

i'm still quite young after all....XD

need to focus back to my darn books...

THings that i DO NOT like..

2011-08-05T04:18:00.000-07:00

well...
i'm not sure why am i posting this but i'm just in the mood of doing it...

things that i detest...

1. ppl acting like they know it all every single time in an arrogant way..

2. hanging up on my phone when the conversation is clearly not finished yet.

3. ppl pushing me to do things that i simply do not want to do..

4. ppl getting impatient with me...

5. ppl who is not willing or rather avoid teaching me..

there are more but i can only write about these few...

i was caught!!!

2011-08-04T07:13:00.000-07:00

gosh!

YH found my blog...

if u ever see this....XD XD

I DON'T CARE!!! :p

SEE ALL U LIKE.....XD XD

why?

2011-08-04T00:24:00.000-07:00

i really wonder whether he knows how sorry am i...

today in class...

i realised that quite a many ppl decided to accompany him go to kamal...

i was happy yet mad...

happy that he's not going alone...

mad cz he could have actually asked other ppl...

but it's not worry...

the thing is settled..

i wonder why am i so angry these few days...

stupid exam..

i think it's all cz of exam that i'm having mood swings...

i'm so scared of failing and i always think i will fail somehow or rather...

i don't trust in luck...

though how i wished i'm always that lucky in life...

tensed and anxious are not a nice feelings..

i wish to be different for once...

wear clothes that ppl won't expect me to wear...

talk in such a way that ain't me...

eat as much as i like without feeling scared to gain weight...

spend all i like without having to worry that i've spent too much...

why can't i be that girl?

why?

To say Yes or No

2011-08-03T04:29:00.000-07:00

i have been disappointing a very important friend in class.

he never expected me to say no....but i've said it...i've said no...

he just wanted me to accompany him to kamal to get those damn stethoscope thingy and i said no cz i needed more time to study...

i seriously cannot go out...

i need to stay in my room to study...

i really need the stupid damn time...

he really knows how to make me feel so sorry and bad for saying no...

i hate it...

he knew i'd say no....

why must he make my life so miserable...

why??!

why....

i really wanted to say yes cz he's one of my very good friend...

he's a good person too...

too nice and helpful...

why must it be near exam time...

why must he be so "clever" in choosing the time...

i'm soooo pissed..

i'm so mad...

i'm ANGRY!

Freedom of Words

2011-07-30T03:28:00.000-07:00

you may think we have the right to voice out right.

NO! you're absolutely wrong!

if there's anything that happened, there's no such thing as freedom of words.

you have to learn to swallow it down and let it digest into ur stomach and intestine.

you have got to learn to bear with all the unhappy and ridiculous decision made by whoever it is...*i shall not state*

if u have managed to read my previous blog then you will know what i meant...

due to unforeseen circumstances, i was forced to delete it..

why do we need to worry?

what is it that is holding us back?

if we're unhappy, then complain.

talk it out to solve the problem.

of course my way of complaining is to blog it out for the public to read...

till then...

to those who has more guts...

just write whatever u think..

of course...dont speak aloud whatever that comes into ur mind cz once the harm has done the scar will be there...

i'm just unhappy with the management.

not referring to any particular friend or ppl.

A Moment of Shock

2011-07-15T05:38:00.000-07:00

i'll just spend about 6 mins writing this post...

i cannot believe it...

one of my classmates is going to leave taylors soon...

just the thought of having sb leaving the class like for good somehow just saddens me...

i hope her for the very best in wherever she will be going..

i hope that regardless what...at least try to keep in touch in fb or sth...

it's weird how life works...

we are surrounded by ppl everywhere...

we get to be classmates and friends not by coincidence...but fate has brought us together..

i know i'm not that close to you but you have my full support in whatever choice you've decided...

specially dedicated to Wei Lin...=]

Relationship

2011-07-14T09:15:00.000-07:00

i had a lot in mind..

wanted to write them down...

but every time i open my blog...i have forgotten what to write...

so, i'll just write whatever is in my mind now lar...=]

being at *the age*

ppl are talking about relationship..

i mean...ppl around me talk about relationship so yea..

so...i've concluded that...

1. before u commit, think twice whether is he/she really meant for you and are you really meant for him/her.

2. are u ready to commit yourself?

because if you are not then it will be unfair to your partner.

3. are you trying to rush into things and relationships?

because patience is usually the key to success..

4. are you thinking too much and over-reacting?

sometimes it's best not to think too much to maintain the relationship.

ppl meet not by chance but fate has brought us together.

so it's best to to retain that relationship unless unforeseen circumstances have occurred.

whenever we meet new ppl or when among friends the topics we talk about, there are bound to be ppl asking, do you have a boy friend or do you have a girl friend?

it's a common question that many will ask eventually...hahahaha...

i've been teasing my friend in class..

will not go into details..

just write cz i wanna pour at least the starting out...and it shall end here...XD

i'm starting to like my course...but like the usual, i dont like the exams...

just gonna wish myself all the best for exams next monday! =D

give give give..

2011-07-11T02:02:00.000-07:00

i still dont get it...

why wouldnt ppl just listen to me?

taking me for granted..

i never want to try to make an effort for the class for any other group..

it's just so pointless..

it's just a one-sided thingy...

all i ever do i just give give give and give....

that's it...

never again...

A Change

2011-07-08T06:18:00.000-07:00

what change am i talking about?

is it the penny change?

definitely NOT!

malaysia needs a change..

whatever it is....the system has got to change...

it's for the people and ONLY FOR THE PEOPLE....

tomorrow....people will be wearing yellow...it's the colour for human rights...

so guessed what...

the roads everywhere in selangor was blocked...

the jam was horrible...

for a distance for only 600m....guessed what...we were stuck for 2 HOURS!!

how stupid is that???!!

what is the purpose of the road block???

is it for our safety or vice versa?

==""""

the block was soooo long...my friends and i end up singing, dancing, pouring water in the car...

i mean...

how is that even possible?

jam for 2 hours~~!!! just for that short distance..

what is the purpose of the block?

it doesn't strike me...==""""

WE NEED A CHANGE...

*go remove the road blocks....XD *

Say No to Frying Pan

2011-06-28T16:41:00.000-07:00

i'm not trying to be healthy here or anything..

just updating what i've learnt from the talk yesterday..

apparently, the speaker *cannot remember his name* hehehe... was strongly against frying pan..

cooking oil is the worst substance on earth.

though it may contain 99% good oil and only 1% bad oil, IT IS STILL BAD!!

i tablespoon *i think* that contains 1% bad oil will contain 60,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 bad molecules of oil. is that bad? i'll leave the answer to you guys to figure it out.

he claimed that if u fry the oil, u'll further spoil the oil. then, when u fry ur food on the oil u will spoil the protein structure of the food..

this will lead u to have CANCER!!

so, it is best to cook ur food in water *==* then apply oil on the cooked food so that u wont spoil the protein structure of the food and also wont spoil the oil.

try not to take oil diet totally away from ur diet cz WE STILL NEED IT.

just gotta change the diet...

EAT LESS FRIED FOOD and try to HAVE MORE BOILED FOOD.....

eat more vege and fruits...

i guess this statement is starting to make some sense into my head...though i've seen this countless times in any bio book...=)

hence, take ur frying pan, hit ur head and throw it into the rubbish dump...XD

Disappointment

2011-06-14T09:17:00.000-07:00

i cannot believe it..

i wonder why she hates us so much till she gotta remove us from fb..

it bothers me and i wonder why..

this just shows that she doesn't value our friendships so why should i care?

if that is the case why does it bother me?

i'll just treat it as i've never seen her in my life and that she was only one of the strangers on the street.

if that is what she wants then she will get what she wants.

it's a total disappointment.

it's a failed friendship!

it worst than a total complete strangers because we actually knew each other and talked.

once graduation then off from the friendship list.

never in my life i've met such a person.

annoying and stuck-up person.

*doubt she even cares to drop by my blog anyways*

text, fb message, msn asking her how are u....not one was replied.

this friendship, i officially announced...it's over.

i do not want to care and know whatever happens to you.

seriously, i dunno why it bothers me...

we're not close too...==

coincidence or fate?

2011-06-10T08:05:00.000-07:00

you might be wondering why on earth i put that as my title today.

well...YH brought me out to play badminton with his old SAM classmates.

hmm...i was and definitely am excited to see them but i was very shy..

i cannot seem to meet new ppl out of the sudden just like that...

playing badminton is fine but when come upon having dinner with them...

i dunno how to put this into words but i'll try my best..

i'm not the kind of person whom you can meet and immediately talk and talk and talk like you've known each other for years..

i need time to know and understand them 1st..

so while they were talking i couldn't find myself trying to fit into their conversation cz it just seemed too weird for me.

i know it's my problem but i just cannot help it..

perhaps i was also partly tired..

hence, all these thinkings led me to think that are friends coincidence matter or is it fate that leads us to meet each other..

it's a question worth thinking and no answers are there for it...

i am happy to meet them...they are indeed nice ppl and i thank God for blessing me with friendly friends in my journey in completion of my degree course...

Alleluia...!!

the sadness of the KTM

2011-06-08T05:57:00.000-07:00

no doubt ppl are busy travelling from places to places..

since the jam is extremely terrible i don't blame ppl to take public transport.

in fact, i encourage Malaysians to take the public transport to reduce air pollution..

HOWEVER, the public transport here sucks!

especially the KTM (kereta api tanah melayu)...

never in my life have i seen ppl, women cz i entered the women coach so i cannot comment about the men, to actually fight their lives to enter the train like literally.

they pushed, pushed and pushed harder.

i in the middle was unable to push my way out because ppl push me in from behind and neither can i make my way in because when nearing the entrance, ppl are pushing each other to the sides.

i was stuck in the middle, suffocating.

when my mom managed to squeeze her way in, with my huge determination i learned the skill of survival - pushing..

it may sounds lame but at that situation, if u don't insist and be thick skin, there is no way and i mean NO WAY u're able to get onto that train.

right at the entrance when i wanna get into the train, there is this bo leh so lady put her hand and block the entrance.

it's like...what the hell, ppl are trying to get into the train and u're here trying to prevent ppl from getting in the train just because u wanna get in comfortably...

sheesh!!

it's the sadness of the public transport in malaysia.

to improve, there are 2 things that must change.

1. ppl's mentality

2. the system of ktm

i don't really agree in changing the whole train.

it's because u may install more air con or u can even put sofa into the train but if those 2 things never change, the impression that ppl will have after sitting in the ktm is LOUSY!

regarding ppl's mentality.

hey, come on for goodness sake.

if u cannot get into the train then wait for the next.

is it really necessary to push ppl around u just so that u can be the winner and get on the train?

the pushing was so bad that kids cried..

it was the most horrible scene that i've seen in my entire life...

the fight for survival...

and another thing, we should always always que up!!!

if u come 1st of course u get into the train 1st.

it's common sense.

they should be given the priority since they waited the longest.

i met this poor indian muslim..

she waited for the train 4 rounds!!!!

poor girl..

just because she is unable to fight fiercely like some other women can doesn't mean she has got to wait for 4 rounds and it was rather late at night..a lonely girl like her....it's DANGEROUS!!

now, regarding the system...

hey!!

all these problems can be solved if and only if the train never delays and be always regular!!

make it as efficient as the monorail and the lrt..

every 3-5 mins comes a train.

in these way, the ppl do not need to fight tremendously just to hop into that train.

fine, it's hard to maintain.

but isn't our taxes enough for these maintenance?!

it's not like we're asking to build a whole new system or to get rid of the existing trains..

just build more so that it can be more regular...

if there's a will there is a way!

just to be fair...i don't expect ppl's mentality to change overnight...

but at least make a change by adding more trains??!!

all these problems could have been solved.

i am sure that ppl must have spotted all these problems..

why isn't any actions been done?!

the sadness of the public transport in malaysia is indeed an eye sore to the world.

A Triangle Trap

2011-05-31T04:03:00.000-07:00

for those who happens to land into this post you might be wondering what i meant by a triangle trap?

oh well...nth complicated really...

i was in the train going back to my aunt's place...

on my right was an indian arm, left a malay arm, back a chinese back and right in front of me was that metal pillar forming the apex...

i was in the middle, trapped in the triangle...

and hence, the triangle trap..

went to sg wang that area with mom!

FUN!!

got a new dress....WHHHHHEEEEEEEEEE!! =D

Life without Books..

2011-05-30T08:53:00.000-07:00

well well well..

who knows what it is life without books don't we?

let me tell you then..

life without books is kinda BORING!!!

to think i have been complaining that life sucks due to exam...

well, i still hold on to that concept there but life without books?

life without needing to study?

life without having to go to class?

hmm..it sucks!

i missed uni..

i missed school..

i missed seeing my friends..

if life is without exam, then my life would be fantastic.

i will then have no regrets in life.

however, this is the irony of life isn't it?

who knows if there aren't test anymore, would i be posting this blog now?

would i say that life without test is awesome?

would i be contented?

or...would i say sth else...

sth like life without books are the best?

it is the irony of life..

but...i still hold on to that concept and feelings right now that life without examinations is awesome and that life without going to school and books is the worst!

mom came to KL..

i'm happy...=]

my aunt and i took the ktm to Kl sentral to pick her up..

so, we met her and head towards the train...

while we were trying to squeeze into the train, the door closed and i couldn't enter the train cz it was loaded with PEOPLE!!

i was left behind with both my aunt and mom already into the train.

my mom's facial expression was epic and priceless...

hehehehehe...

so, i gotta wait for the next train alone and it was long and late...==

i hate the ktm...

sucks!

inside the ktm...filled with ppl..

argh! the smell of sweat and breath...

couldn't take it...

that's all...

overall, i had a pretty boring holiday till today...can't wait for tomorrow though....XD

Tik Tok Tik Tok

2011-05-22T07:48:00.000-07:00

tik tik tok tok...

time is crawling, walking, RUNNING!!!

it's dashing out, away from my zone, away from my area, away from my life!

i'm getting old...i can feel myself aging..

i can feel the dark circles beneath my eyes, growing uncontrollably just like a tumor cell...

there is no more time and ironically i'm still blogging...

Father said, will we take the easy way out or would we choose the path that needs sacrificing...

that strike me, made me think...

do i always take the easy way out?

Jesus came down from heaven to be crucified willingly to free us from sins..

He chose the path that requires sacrificing to save us...

what have i done?

not only i did not choose the harsh path but i am very confident that i will choose the easy way out to any obstacles i meet...

i feel like a hypocrite...

calling myself a Christian...

calling myself a Catholic...

yet...i doubt i can choose the rocky path...

i need God's grace and mercy...

being lazy is a sin...

exam is in 3 days time i think...

i'm going crazy....

It's just a Normal Week

2011-05-14T17:58:00.000-07:00

it is a humid morning again which has been going on for the past many weeks..

at least today is better today than yesterday...what i meant was my mood....XD

many things happened last week all on last thurs...

afif's car keys left in the car...he locked it then there goes the keys...

spent the whole 3 hours there trying to open the car doors without car keys...

should have called the mechanic....

christine followed me for badminton for the 1st time.

she was talking much during badminton..i wonder why...

perhaps just had thinking skills so her mood must be very down...

she got stranded there for 3 hours too...

i felt so sorry for her cz she wanted to study...

after that we had kfc...

yum yum....i was HUNGRY!! cz waited for so long and i din have lunch...=S

while eating...adrian talked about dissection....NGAITI!!

nearly killed my mood to eat but i still stuff myself in cz i was HUNGRY!!

hhahahhaha...

exam is next week...

no mood to study but still gotta have the mood to study...

won't want to fail do I? OF COURSE NOT!

a thorn in my heart

2011-05-03T05:58:00.000-07:00

it really hurts my heart when Karen said that i couldn't be bothered.

i mean....it's not that i don't wanna go back...but it's just that i do not have the freaking time to go back.

it's not very logical to book the ticket back just for the weekend.

and my hols are not long.

my professor even broke the news that we have to spend our only holidays to go back to uni to continue dissection...

i have no time..

it's not like i don't wanna go out..

it's really disturbing to know that u guys have that thought and that i dunno how to explain to u guys so that u all and understand.

it's really bothering me.

make me feel like that apart for my family members back in Kuching, there is like no other thing worth looking forward for.

i just have the thought that since u guys think of me that way then what is the whole point?

there's no point.

memories will remain as memories.

or perhaps i'm just being sensitive.

nerd

2011-04-19T08:42:00.001-07:00

i feel like a nerd...

i actually stayed until the library in the uni closed!

ngiaiti!!

the whole week was very tiring...

still feel tired...

energy draining

2011-04-18T04:25:00.000-07:00

today's presentation was such a relief!!!

but right...

i felt that all my energy has been drained out...

it's like everything is not important yet they are still important..

so many things are due this week and next week..

i cannot wait for badminton..

it's the only way for me to release stress apparently...

today's Ali's birthday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! ^^

so many April babies in my class...hahhaha!!!

New Church

2011-04-17T00:12:00.000-07:00

honestly speaking,

i don't feel like updating my blog at all..

but just dropping by since i'm already on9...

well well well..

bus was late again as the usual...

but we went to a new church today!!

whee!!

the church was beautiful..though small but it felt just like home....^^

today is Palm Sunday..

so when Father was walking around sprinkling the holy water...i was singing the hymm songs..

finally, Father came to our direction...

he just splash so much of holy water in my direction till a drop entered my eye.. just like an eye drop...

it was so funny that i couldn't hide a giggle...including my friends..

i was splashed with the holy water..it made me feel so energized...=)

so what did i do yesterday??

hmm...oh ya!

spent the whole day preparing for the presentation tomorrow..

it's going to such like shit...

tomorrow i'll just bring the newspaper to hide my face when it's my turn to project the presentation song tomorrow...

oh...and i walked all the way to subang parade with my Christine and Joshua..

mom wasn't happy that i walked so far late at night...

but...oh well...=)

day before..

i went to kajang with some of my classmates to eat satay!!

yum YUM!!

it was awesome cz we bought durian too...hehehehehehe!!!

i guess that's all??

bye for now..=)

blur head..

2011-04-07T09:07:00.000-07:00

well well well..

back to blogging again...though my last post wasn't that long...XD

i had no idea but i've been having insomnia for more than a week..

the worst was yesterday..

slept at 1am

woke up at 5am and consecutively every half an hour after since...

went to uni with my eyes feeling so heavy...argh!

today, the 5 participants and another tagging along went to kedah for a competition...

wishing them all the very best...

they plan to go penang....awesome!!!

wish i could go but it's Rachel's birthday..so i can't go...sad!

hopefully they will buy the durian dodo....yum YUM!! ^^

attended the clinical skills with wen li and YH..

were the seniors Guinea pigs as they wanted to examine our axilla..

lucky YH offered so we girls can sit back and relax...whheee!! XD

ate in AC today...

gracious...the food was terribly salty!!!

not planning to go there in another dunno how many many many months time again..XD

went to college to visit our college lecturers with chitra, yen li and wen li...

missed them so much..

managed to visit all except for Mr Chan (physic lecturer)

LOL!!

CA results out!

i passed!

darn happy though results aren't good..

will work harder but i still thank the Lord for giving me a pass....^^

thank you Lord... Hallelujah!

today...

overall...

my head was heavy...now still is...

hopefully tomorrow will be a better day....*keeping fingers crossed*

oh!

Lynn is coming to meet us tomorrow...

i guess tomorrow will be a better day...

*grinning*

nights! ^^

thoughts from the heart

2011-04-04T09:18:00.000-07:00

i just realised one thing...

i'm starting to update my blog as a way to release stress and a way to look away from books...just giving myself reasons so that i get to do some other stuff besides studying...

not that i study everyday but if u don't touch the books u'll just have that guilty feelings...XD

i wonder when CA will be out?

i have a great feeling that i will fail..

crap man..

i don't wanna fail...ish ish...

my classmates are starting to pair me up with 3 guys in class..

among them, one happens to be my seniors.

it's just rather annoying though i know they're just joking...lol

joke for a day or 2 is still fine...but everytime i stand with one of them then ppl start talking isn't a very nice feeling..

it'll just make the whole situation very embarrassing...

i prefer to talk like friends without the need to feel embarrassed..

i don't know how those guys felt but for me...it's rather awkward...hehehe...

oh well..

i kinda mind but starting to get used to being teased by ppl...

it's not the 1st time anyways...LOL!!!

gotta sleep..

nights..=)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

2011-03-30T09:42:00.000-07:00

today is Andrew's birthday!

i was so scared that i will forget to call him as lately i cannot seem to remember little little things anymore...not to say that his birthday is not important but my memory is packed with books and other stuff...sign of old age...hmmm...

what's more...Yen Li's birthday is tomorrow!! ^^

MJ, Chor, Wen Li, Tim and myself celebrated her birthday in uni today....tonight to be more specific...heheheh...

1st time in my life i celebrated somebody's birthday in uni, by the lakeside...

the feeling was just awesome..=)

guess what??!!

i saw Dr Mohit in uni while celebrating Yen Li's birthday..

goodness!

nearly had myocardial infraction...=S

he came to uni to watch cricket competition on the screen..

so sporty..

we cut a piece of cake for him lar..XD

after that, we played fireworks!!! ^^

yea yea...we know it's illegal but the fun and excitement overcame the fear of getting caught (which we din get caught)...

i'm starting to love my uni life...ehehehehehe....

this is fun!!!

but...

CA2 is coming...

better enjoy before the nightmare comes again...goodness...

today is a great day and i hope tomorrow will be too...=)

Bye bye...

as darkness creep by

2011-03-19T07:22:00.000-07:00

i just cannot stand it any longer.

i know thast i am wasting my precious time away but i just need to pour the stress out from my heart.

even though i know there's not a single person in the world that may not understand me and i don't hope that there will ever be, i still need to say this out loud...

i'm really stressed out!

i'm stress, ok i'm stress.

so be it...

i'm stress and i'm stress..

i don't need more stress be added upon my shoulders.

i don't want any more little small matter ruin my whole mood...

i just cannot bear any more stress put upon me..

i cannot fail..

i shall not fail..

i really want to pass...

i really want to study..

i can't if all these small little matter keep on bugging me...

stop it!

i cannot bear it!

i cannot...

i need...to...escape...

escape from this world...

escape from this pathetic, stressful world...

even mother earth is crying out loud...

so why can't i?

headache and darkness is falling upon me..

i had a great day today..

i really had until...

all this small, useless argument came by...

just by the thought of it made me feel so ridiculous...

this has got to end..

it has to...

it has to....

*as darkness creep by*

a holiday is no longer a holiday..

2011-03-14T23:10:00.000-07:00

guess what....today is a holiday!

it's a hard earned holiday...

well, that's the good news...the bad news is that CA is just next monday..

sad isn't it?

a holiday is no longer a holiday..

things have started to slow down...yup!

that's a good thing!

i;m beginning to like my course...*never expected that*

it's God's blessings indeed!

liking the course however does not mean i like exam!!

i just wish that monday hurry come and hurry go..

then...even if it's not a holiday, the whole week will seem like a holiday to me till then...XD

i'm keeping my fingers crossed hoping that i won't fail...=S

a lot things have happened.

but i'm just taking it lightly..

no point getting so worked out over some tiny things.

that's how i run away from stresses.

not to say that i don't have stress but just trying to avoid unnecessary stress....=)

after checking through my calenders, i realised that i don't have holidays enough to go back to Kuching...life sucks but let's not worry about that if not it'll turn into an unnecessary stress..

oh ya! i finally ate Taylor's college's spaghetti...it's awesome and cheap!! ^^

oh oh...Christine is back....gotta go...

bye...=)

It's just another day..

2011-03-06T03:34:00.000-08:00

i can't believe what's the date today.

it's already the beginning of march.

just proves how time flies..

i attended some christian fellowship that Christine brought me to.

oh well...i had fun...the only problem is that the whole was conducted in mandarin..so it took awhile for me to switch my brain into the chinese mode...XD

oh ya...i saw Si How's big brother here. got quite a shocked cz my mom taught him before. what a small world it is.

CA is in another 2 weeks time..

i'm freaking scared cz i got a feeling that i won't be able to finish studying in time and ironically i still have the time to drop by my blog and write something right now.

funny how life works right. LOL!

something about my classmates.

they're fun and cool ppl..

but i can't feel the bond that i used to feel when i was doing SAM last year.

oh well.. i guess we still need time to really develop the mutual feeling and trust among ourselves.

i went for mass today.

gosh! the bus was super late.

i can't believe it!

it was 30 mins late!

we waited waited and waited.

i got a bit tired and frustrated.

i guess it's God's some sort of humour or joke...HAHAHHA!!

oh well...i gotta go study study and study..

will update again when i remember to...

nights!

3rd Week in MBBS

2011-02-10T00:57:00.000-08:00

today is thursday.

goodness. cannot believe how fast can time flies so fast.

it was just yesterday since it was CNY!

CNY in Malacca was just awesome!!

drank Brandi and bottoms up with my uncle was my 1st experience. not going to do that ever again. LOL!!

3rd week studying medicine in taylor's is getting very hectic.

the syllabus are getting way deeper and the lecturers just talk as if there's nobody's business there. they expects us to know like nearly everything. can't blame them. they are after all lecturers.

this struck me one thing. that is.....i gotta read much much more before going to class.

nearly slept in class today and yesterday.

the schedule was just so packed!!!

i can hardly breathe..

my head became so heavy!

better prepare more snacks so that it can fill up my tummy immediately before the very next class.

i gotta catch the shuttle bus everyday but today was the worst compared to another bad day.

that day, i had to run after the bus cz it came early and naturally it left early. so i had to chased after the bus. luckily the bus turned into my direction so i could hop into it.

today, i had to run from 8th floor to 1st floor to catch the bus. class supposed to end at 4 but it dragged to 4.08 and the bus comes at 4.10.

goodness! i flew to the max cz the lift wasn't willing to stop. finally at the 6th floor, the lift opened and i just zoomed into the lift sweating.

i practically ran with my sch bag to the bus stop there, felt like an insane lady. but i dont have much of a choice. if i missed that bus, i gotta wait for another hour for the next bus. i'm so not going to waste my time waiting. my head is heavy, i'm tired and sleepy. no way i'm going to get stuck in the library * supposedly doing some revision...XD*

oh well, i gotta go get a nap before doing some reading again.

bye for now.

HOliDay!

2011-01-30T04:12:00.000-08:00

wow!

today is monday, the last day of the month of Jan, also the beginning of my holiday after 2 weeks in uni...i felt so relieved! *i mean u can't count weekends as holidays right? XD*

two weeks learning 8 introductions as i have 8 subjects to cover was really not an easy job.

nothing much was said by the lecturers but we have already started to feel the tension and stress.

i sure hope i wont regret making this decision ever!

i spent the entire week to memorise my way in the uni as i have a very bad memory for roads and things like that....*blushing*

i remembered my very 1st morning catching the shuttle bus from my area to uni...it is still vivid in my mind.

i woke up extremely early. bus supposed to come at 7 but it reached at 7.15am.

so many ppl were waiting at the bus stop.

the moment the bus arrived, everyone started to rushed to the bus. we shoved shoulder to shoulder and finally i managed to enter the bus.

darn it! the bus driver asked me to go out as the seats were all taken. we weren't even allowed to stand for goodness sake!

so, i gotta wait for the next shuttle bus which supposed to come at 7.25am but came at 7.40 instead. my class started at 8!! i reached uni exactly at 8 right on the spot due to the massive traffic jam! argh!!!! i ran up panting. thank goodness the lecturer was considerate...=)

ever since that incidence, i've learned the so called survival skills...which is to get into the bus 1st before the rest starts to follow up.

wow...so that was 1st day...the following days were better. i'm starting to get used to sitting bus. not hard just tiring...

Now!!

it's holiday for the chinese!

it's CHINESE NEW YEAR in another few days time....for the rabbit year!

so the fashion for this season is white! LOL!!

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR to all the chinese and those celebrating this unique festival and HAPPY HOLIDAYS for the non chinese! ^^

My Choice

2011-01-28T19:44:00.000-08:00

Finally...

after deciding for so long...

remembering the last post regarding the road taken or not...

i have chosen the road taken..

i have decided to choose the path that is taken by many....

the path that i have basics on...

and no doubt the path that is going to be tough and challenging...

i sure hope i can make it to the end...

just to reveal the path that i have chosen...

i have chose to do medicine in taylor's university...

i have faith in that uni though i'm going to be the 1st batch...

i mean....i gotta have faith in them as i'm going to stay there for the whole of 5 years.....hehehhe...

wish me best...=D

The Road Taken or Not Taken

2010-12-20T00:33:00.000-08:00

Coming to the world, getting old, falling sick and eventually meeting death is every process that one has to face. nevertheless, choosing the right pathway is also a major decision to every student and I happen to face that problem now.

should i choose a course that i'm at least a little bit familiar with but it's extremely difficult or another course which is easier but i have the least bit idea what it is about? passion is not only the element but we must have parents consent.

i sure hope i will choose the right path soon...

Last Day

2010-10-22T02:03:00.000-07:00

i remembered clearly when i stepped into Taylor's College for the 1st time...
the feeling was scared, nervous and excited.
together, hand in hand, Karen and I went to MPH and searched for our class.

i can't believe it.
time flies....back then i was wondering when wil finals come???
now...today....is the last day of class....the last day that G4 students will gather together in a class..

i feel so sad....i'm still not ready to depart with my classmates...i love them...i like being with them...today we depart....who knows when will be meet again..

we will only meet during our finals...that is also we're not gonna be in the same class.
ARGH! i cannot believe that i'm experiencing the sadness of departing again...it reminds me of when i'm back at Kuching High again....

the feeling is sour, sad and that no words can describe much....

for lunch....we went together as the whole class with our physic teacher...Mr Chan u rock!!! ^^
He showed us his pics when he was still young back then....OMG! he's so buff!! XD XD
*extremely good looking too....;p ;p*

Mr. Tharam was so sad...He said that G4 was his best class this year....we all missed him terribly...sigh...

Pn Mahani was still super hyper but i can see that she was missing us dearly too....
Bio was still fine though....cute teacher...

Oh MAN!!!!!!!!! i dont wanna part so fast....yet i want SAM to hurry end....what am i to do? =(

ALL THE BEST IN FINALS TO ALL SAM STUDENTS AND EXPECIALLY TO FRIENDS FROM G4.....^^

Mischievous Kiss

2010-10-04T16:09:00.000-07:00

i'm still watching this movie and i realised that there are many bad comments regarding this new movie acted in the korean version.

i simply dont understand what is wrong with the ppl commenting on this movie...

i find it perfectly fine, indeed suitable and just fitted our high school life.

i came across a comment stating that it contains obseen scene like when bak seung jo (kim hyun joong) was carrying oh ha ni (jung so min), he stated that hers was too small *if you get what i meant =)*

how can that be obseen? ok..i admit it's not that very nicet o hear him state that, especially at the scene when oh ha ni stuff her socks into her blouse...hahha!!

in fact, i find both that scenes very hilarious. if ppl cannot get the joke then it's pretty sad ain't it? the obseen scenes are just like peanuts. it's less than few minutes. why is the reaction so big?

also, this movie is not for little children be they girls or boys to watch. it's for teenagers, youths to watch. it stated clearly that the theme is in high school. what for your little girl or boy go and watch?

if they cannot understand the little joke behind these scenes then it's best not to continue watching it as it 's pointless if they dont get it especially parents.

i guess the watching rate it pretty low as it's already the 3rd or 4th version. there is the anime version, japanese, taiwanese and now korean version.

so, to all the crews in mischievous kiss, dont be sad. keep up the good work! i love your movie and i find it hilarious behind all the jokes. dont stop halfway as it'll be very saddening.

sleepy

2010-09-18T07:49:00.000-07:00

as darkness crawls over my heavy head, i suddenly felt that.......i.....want.....to.......give up!!!!!!!!!!!

goodness....i cannnot believe that i've suvived SAM till trials....
next week is trials....after that it'll be finals....

wow....how time flies....

Back

2010-09-08T07:59:00.000-07:00

well...
i'm back again..
this time i'm writing this blog in the midst of preparing for trials...what a time to choose...LOL!!

just dropping by to say..
...
...
....
i hate trials...!!!

OMG!!!

I'M PRACTICALLY GOING INSANE!!

hurry come hurry go...i promise i won't miss you one bit.

people are getting 2 weeks hols and i'm getting just merely a week..
hey!! not fair!! can't anybody sense the unfairness here??
together in the same country but there are some not getting hols, some a few days and some darn lucky to have 2 weeks off from prison...oh man!!

gtg....good luck to all who are preparing for exams....
BOO EXAM!!

friends..

2010-08-19T04:22:00.000-07:00

how you ever wondered what life will be without a single friend?
what if not a single person in class like you?
what about if wherever you walked and people seems to avoid you and start whispering to other friends about you behind your back?

how you ever wondered then if yout life is filled with laughter?
people all wanted to talk to you till you don't know who to entertain first?
will that be too tiring?
will that start to be annoying?

is life really better by just having a few close friends who will always be by your side, supporting you, cheering you up when you're sad. i guess that's the best.

it's not always the best solution to know somebody truely.
usually friends will only treat you good when you're somehow still a stranger.
there are also people who only will open their feelings to really close friends.

for me. i will only open to friends who know me and whom i feel comfortable with.
sure, everyone is my friend but what i meant was really close friends.

we meet not by chance but faith has brought us together.
appreciate people whom you think worth appreciating.
it's not every day we get to meet the same person. maybe we meet and group together this year but there will separation next year whereby we start to adapt into new environment and meet new people.
dont ever forget old friends after meeting new ones.
if we forget old friends, might as well be a loner. what for have friends?

cheers to all of my friends that they will do well in their examination. ^^

time flies

2010-08-16T03:04:00.000-07:00

wow...
this definitely gotta be my 1st time writing a personal blog in college..
sucks but what choice do i have left?
life is starting to be very miserable without the Internet. ish!!

i cannot describe how happy i am today..^^
chem is over!! yippee!!! though i dont think i did well...could have done better but what is over is over...gonna have to leave it all in the hands of God....^^

well...what have i been doing for the past few weeks...or months?
gosh...din realise i din come to my blog ever since the FIFA world cup! how could i? XD

i attended a methodish church last week i think..
it was something new...something that wasn't normal for me...
well...curiosity brought me there...but i still prefer my own chuch..LOL!!!

i'm having bio and hy write up for tomorrow...couldn't care less...
felt too restless and tired to worry all these practical things anymore..
i've been busy and worried over all these tests and practicals and reports and there are starting to drain my energy away from me.

flipping through my calender...i din realise that it's already in the middle of october!!!!!!!!
OMG!!!
nearly a year has past..
can still remember the last year this day, i;m still preparing for darn SPM!
missed those precious time with my friends.
i'm not saying my new friends are no good, just missed my old ones.
*shedding a tear*

trails is next month. finals in another 2 months time i think?

i'm starting to love singing!
yay!!
have been singing in my room loudly for the past few weeks...wonder if i've irritated my housemates....SORRY!! hhahahahha...

so.......that's all for now? gotta go back to my house, back to my room, back to boredom...LOL!!!

bye. =)

Spain! Poor Netherland

2010-07-12T05:08:00.000-07:00

i just cannot believe it..
my 1st time watching football early in the morning at 2.30 a.m. till 5 a.m.!!!

can't blame me..it's the FIFA world cup finals...can't miss that can i?
it's only once every 4 years..hahaha!!
1st time i watched with a group of friends....
the atmosphere was indeed overwhelming..

if i have the chance again...i'll definitely DO IT AGAIN!
hahahha!!

walked all the way to the pasar...so shiok....^^

2 things i dont like about watching football outside are..
1) guys in front of me have terrible hairstyles...block my vision...==
2) they smoke....ish!!!!

sad thing about the world cup is that Netherland LOST!!!!!!!!!!!
poor Netherland...i supported u...haiz...
just not ur luck i suppose...
work harder next time...^^

jia you!!!!!!!!!!!!

lalalalal

2010-06-16T07:31:00.000-07:00

well...back to college..
in fact, i don't have the mood to come back at all!
it was so awesome back sarawak whereby i get to eat familiar food again...yum yum..
food here in subang is not only oily, expensive but it also sucks till i'm speechless..==

omg omg omg...my mom said that i'm getting fat...O.O
i refused to believe to the fact that i'm gaining weight but i have to accept that drastic fact..i am fat le lar..sniff sniff..

what else to update?
oh yea...while on the plane back to Kl, the sky was so beautiful.
it was filled with white fluffy clouds that look like cotton candies...heheheh...
it was so amazing...will upload when i have the time...hahahha!!

oh yea...i'm now quite obsessed with california girls and my first kiss these 2 songs...amazing..hahahahah!! gotta hear them many times b4 i really start to like it....XD XD

well that's all i guess....bye....^^

sick

2010-05-13T21:36:00.000-07:00

gosh..i think i'm coming down with fever..
feeling weak..
feeling stressed out..
feeling tired..
backache..
headache..
sleepy..
omg...

sick..
i'm also quite sick of life..
this is just too sadenning..
i cant wait for next week to hurry come and end..
so that my life can be filled with colours again.

cheers for all..

tired

2010-05-13T04:03:00.000-07:00

i'm tired..
i smelled..
i wanna sleep..
it's pointless to write but i just wanna take my mind off studies for the moment.

k. times up.
gotta go back to my books...

hmm

2010-05-09T20:32:00.000-07:00

cant believe that i'm actually writing my blog in college!
in COLLEGE eh...in a place where i'm supposed to be studying or in class?
but no worries....now is my break time...hahaha!!!

got nothing to do...
feeling bored...
feeling tired...
feeling full..
wanna go sleep and be a pig...hahahhahaah!!!!

i attended my cousin's concert last sat..
it was awesome!!'
loved the pianist...awesome!!!!!!!!!
really admire those who can play musical instruments...(especially guys...muahhaha...XD)
especially the violinist...AWESOME!!!!!

attended my another cousin's friend's birthday party among all her classmates and friends..
13 years old...AWKWARD!!
but i had fun....XD XD
many thought i was in form 1 too and one thought i was in form 3...suddenly got that young feeling...muahahhahah!!!

mid-term is coming...it's just round the corner...
nervous yet tired...
what to do what to do..

bye for now.

2010-05-05T06:40:00.000-07:00

finally..
after months being in college..
i've never had this feeling ...
i felt so RELAX!

i went to print and bind my english project till 8 sth pm..
though i still left highlighting..
but at least that was the worst and the most burdening project among all my other assignments is finally almost done..

i could at least relax and breathe for a moment..
the feeling is just too great and that no words can really describe..

AWESOME!

many things i hate being a girl..

2010-05-03T03:47:00.000-07:00

gosh! i just hate being a girl these few days..

1. gotta face pms
2. gotta go through mp..
3. gotta be polite
4. cannot be rough..
5. face difficulty in doing most of the work..
6. gotta apply makeup sooner or later in life..
7. some clothes just dont look good on me..
8. guys walk just way too fast..

haiz...cannot think anymore...
i know the reasons i gave is sooooooooo lame...but it's a fact and i gotta face them...
life sucks..

2010-04-30T18:10:00.000-07:00

what a bright morning today is...

last night was the only night in this whole week that i managed to sleep for so long..hahha!!
however i tossed and turned last night...i just couldn't fall asleep...maybe it's cz i took my bath rather late last night...

i haven't taken my breakfast today..
the moment i woke and do all the necessary things like brushing teeth so on, i started to do my chem project.

next week there's gonna be exam and assignments for the whole week again...
again, what an awesome life i have..==""

i've been spending so much for this month..
what can be done to stop me from spending? O.o

2010-04-27T07:12:00.000-07:00

life is indeed getting better...
though there are still tests going on...
though i still face deadlines which is just round the corner..
though i still got lots of homework and lessons to catch up...
somehow life isn's that bad anymore...

tests are horrible...
they are terrible..
in fact they are rotten vegetables that nobody in the world can actually use the right term to describe tests..

having math test tomorrow till fri..
monday physic test..
this fri gotta hand in bio project - 1000words
next mon gotta hand in chem project - 1000 words which coincide with physic test
next wed gotta hand in english project - 2000 words..

17th may mid term test..

test test test...
when is it going to end?
who will be the courageous ones to stand up and say NO to test?
which politicians will fight for our rights and cut down exams?

odd thinking but i'm currently quite sick of tests and exams...

hate

2010-04-11T05:47:00.000-07:00

i just don't get it...
are there are anything else besides studying?
why are studies so important?

i hate ppl interfering my life..
i hate ppl pushing me to do sth that i will do in the end.
there's no need to keep on reminding me what i need to do.

there are times i feel like running away..
do sth that ppl will never ever ever thought that i'd do..
sometimes i wish i could just have to guts to do sth that u will never approve me doing..

at the end of the day...
all i can actually do is just lie down on my bed and cry..
i can never do any of the things i stated above..
i have no guts..
i have no confidence..
i have no control over my life..
my life is just white, black and grey..
there are no colours at all in my life..

i can't even have fun at all..
this is so ridiculous..
i hate my life so much..
it was never my intention at all..

sometimes i wish my life could hurry end..
sometimes i wish my teenage life could hurry end..
i do wish that my life as a student could hurry end..

so many things that i'm wishing...
which one will come 1st?
which one can u understand?

"i'm not forching u...u always have a choice."

i hate that statement so much..
it;s not making me feel much better but in fact worse..
u wanted to make me feel bad..
u wanted me to do sth that u wanted..

i hate you...
i hate my life..
i hate everybody..

sad

2010-03-17T07:32:00.000-07:00

i think right...
my title of my blog should be named my sad life instead of my life..
how can college life sucks so badly??

no tv..in fact got but the tv here sucks till no words can describe it..
no games..i only have my laptop here..
i mean...wad can i do?
there's nth i can do..

with assignments piling like shit..
i still can't be bothered to do it..
it's just too much till i dunno where to start..
besides...
coming here is so tiring..
by the time i reach home i gotta cook..
take a bath..
eat..

where is the freaking time to do work?
most of the time used us to finish up homework..
then here come projects..
stupid stupid stupid..

does the sc stream really suit me?
if so why am i suffering?
does the art side stuff really suit me?
this sucks..

3 months have gone by..
when can this year hurry end?

scewed my chem

2010-03-15T01:34:00.000-07:00

gosh!!!
i cannot believe that my nightmare has finally came true...
i really go screw my chem!!

somehow i cannot do my chem today...
my mind was in a whirl...
i cannot think..

the thing is other students seem to finish so fast like a piece of cake..
PRESSURE!!!

a bit tired of SAM..
it is just so darn tiring...
i could hardly smile these few days...
my energy just seemed to drain from my body..
my emotion and feelings are down to the max these few days..

assignments, tests and deadlines are just endless...
have to worry not to over budget myself..

this is just getting ridiculous...
how am i supposed to survive if i can't even stand SAM?

I LOVE SAM!
I LOVE TAYLOR'S!
I LOVE MYSELF!
I WANT TO DO BETTER!
I CAN DO IT!!!

(trying to psycho myself)

SPM

2010-03-10T04:08:00.000-08:00

omg omg omg....tomorrow spm result is out!!
omg omg omg...

can't believe that i really have to go through this...=S

keeping my fingers crossed...

so so beh song..

2010-03-09T00:12:00.000-08:00

there's this person i sooooooooooooooooo beh song...
as i don't wanna say out the name...i'll just refer to the person as "it"...XD

don't like it's attitude...
childish..
selfish..

no words can describe it..
zzzz....

oh well...i have to take back my words from the previous post...
assignments are actually still increasing...
today i got my physic topic..
wad in the world..

my english due date is 30/3..my bro's birthday...crap!

i got my bio topic approved dy! yay!!
means i got more work to do..==""

no exam this thurs and fri...yay!!!
cz of that...our chem test which was supposed to be this friday is canceled..
postponed to monday...which is actually not a good thing...cz monday is also my physic homework deadline..CRAP!

physic test next thurs....SHOOT!

boooo SAM...==""

Tiredness to the Max

2010-03-04T04:03:00.000-08:00

gosh...i dunno i haven't been updating my stupid blog for how many many months de..XD

things have been quite hectic lately..
exams, exams and exams almost every week...nearly every day..

kl is so not like kuching..
i don't have my house phone anymore whether i can call ppl anytime i like..
now right here right now...whatever i'm doing..i gotta think and reconsider about $$..

kl is so darn hot...to make matter not pleasant..my room doesn't have an air-con..==""

assignments are not increasing but the deadlines are indeed getting closer and they're not really giving us much time to do as we have exams nearly every day! RIDICULOUS!

i got back some of my results...not exactly good...is average...haiz...how on earth am i gonna get high TER??

talking about my class...gosh...my classmates are so terror..they are all so super smart..kinda of scary but then again it's easier to ask them things as they are such nice ppl and all...XD

to think back..i was once so excited to come to kl..
thought that it'd be cool and fun to live here alone...freedom was just right in front of me..
then again..life isn't that fun..u don't have a car u can't get anywhere...
the train is like so packed and sitting in a taxi isn't that cheap...oh well..

oh ya!
SPM is out on the 11th march!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
no way!!!
this is just too scary for words!!!!

Homework

2010-02-09T06:05:00.000-08:00

sheeesh man...
why are there never ending homework given???

Whew...

2010-02-07T06:36:00.000-08:00

whew....wad a tiring day today...

i went back to my aunt's place on friday with my rashes on my face...i think it's due to the chilli that i ate with ban mian that friday...

gosh!!! it was so embarrassing...
my guy cousin said, " wad happen??!!"
i said, " wad?"
" u applied makeup is it?"
i got a shocked...hahah....didn't know that rashes on my cheeks made him thought that i applied makeup...is my face that "white"?? XD

my aunt said when she saw me that friday, "wad happened to u??!! u looked healthier!! XD"
i nearly fainted on that day...hahahahah...

my uncle said, " somebody punched u on the face is it? "

so many different types of answers regarding on the rashes on my poor poor face....
funny la...hahahah..

my aunt gave me eat one type of med that night...it was suppose to make me feel sleepy...ended up..i slept whole day on the 2nd day...=="""

i watched tiger woohoo today...^^
very funny...but somehow the guys malaysian acters all look rather sissy and they acted sissy...XD XD
way to go malaysians!!! hahahha...

well...tomorrow is my math and bio exam....wish me luck as i'm going my go zzz...LOL!!!

nights!!! ^^

hmm

2010-02-02T01:15:00.000-08:00

hmm..
i dunno wad to write anymore in my blog...but i just don't wanna keep it not updated..heheh..

well..2 more days...my physic test is coming...kinda nervous..
today while i was walking down the corridor with my friends...i can't help noticing that our college's notice boards are actually filled with pics...
ppl are trying to gain ppl's vote for the student council..

hmm...dunno wad they do there but i only have one year in taylor's so i don't plan to get myself involved as much as i did back in kuching...^^

so far...today is a great day...tiring though..haha...

oh ya...this darren...call me aunty...zzzzzZZZZZ

i feel like crying..

2010-01-31T06:52:00.000-08:00

T.T
i hope that i won't cry again after tonight..

Kl

2010-01-31T05:57:00.000-08:00

well...this is my last day for the month of Jan..
tomorrow is gonna be the beginning of the month of Feb...
can't believe that things are going so fast..

i'm already having assignments and homework so fast..
test is just this thurs...my deadline for english also falls on the same day..

things are getting a lot..and i'm getting very tired..
luckily i have lovely relatives here to bring me go out shopping..
if not i'll just go crazy...^^

i met lots of lovely friends in Kl too...^^
without them my life will just be dead boring...

in conclusion...life here in Kl...life here in college...is...just...dead tiring...haiz..

I can't believe it

2010-01-13T04:58:00.000-08:00

today's orientation was just one word...BORING!!!!
talks talks and more talks...

walked with karen in the afternoon...

that's it i guess..

My Room

2010-01-12T00:14:00.001-08:00

wow...i
m finally in my own room in Kl..
small but still big enough for me to fit in..XD

not that cozy but still bearable..
missed my very own bed..hehehe...

can't wait for tomorrow
hope that tomorrow will be a better day..^^
keeping my fingers crossed...=)

Alone

2010-01-10T04:35:00.000-08:00

my mom went back to Kuching today..
rained heavily today..

we were soaked from head to toe..

Mom is gone back to kuching...i guess she's still in the plane right now....
missed her and my dad and my brother..

cant wait to go back to kuching dy...

hope that i'll have a great time in KL for the rest of days here...
=)

I'm In KL

2010-01-10T04:33:00.000-08:00

i know that it's kinda out dated dy but i now only have the time to really update my poor little bloggie..hehe...

i've reached Kl on the 8th..
went out whole day on the next day and saw my room and not to mention stayed there for one night...

love it...XD

Emotionless

2010-01-06T18:23:00.000-08:00

well...
today..is the last day that i'm gonna be in Kuching..
tomorrow i'll be off to Kl and i'll have to wait till March only i can come back for a few days then back to Kl again..

feelings?
not much feelings actually..
nervous?
not really..
excited?
not so too..
scared?
can't say that i'm feeling scared..

so wad are my feelings now?
haha..
tomorrow is gonna be the day that i gotta depart and say goodbye..
i guess the feeling is just reluctant and that i'm so gonna miss not only my family members but also my friends in sch and friends from church..

i guess the feeling is that i don't wanna depart yet there's not much choice as i'm departing for the sake of my future..

there's always ppl leaving and meeting each time..
so i guess it's just part of life..

another thing is that i'm also curious wad will my life be in college...
will i meet and have lots of new friends?

or will i just be the little girl in the past whom was so ever shy and scared to talk to ppl and also not to mention scared to looked at their eyes..

or will i be lucky and remain as wad i am today..like wad i've changed ever since i was 16 and be a bit more open to ppl and talked to ppl?

or will i be a loner whereby i'll keep my feelings to myself again?

there are so many assumptions..
i don't really have much faith in myself..
i'm not scared and i'm not nervous..
i just don't have much faith in meeting new ppl though that's i really want to do so-meeting new ppl.

Lord..pls help me over come this phobia and not only have faith in myself but also have faith in YOU..
Amen.

God Will Make a Way

2009-12-29T01:35:00.000-08:00

"God will make a way

Where there seems to be no way

He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me

He will be my guide

Hold me closely to His side

With love and strength

For each new day

He will make a way

By a roadway in the wilderness

He'll lead me

And rivers in the desert will I see

Heaven and earth will fade

But His Word will still remain

He will do something new today"

well...things have been settled..=)

feeling happy...=)

From: http://www.musicbabylon.com

Is It God's Will?

2009-12-28T16:27:00.000-08:00

is it really God's will?
there's been so much problem..
nothing seems to be going smoothly..
why is it so that i'm the one who's been facing problems while others seem to get the easy way out?

is it really God's will that i'm not meant to be there?

Aching Day

2009-12-24T02:32:00.000-08:00

Wow...

can't believe that today was gonna be such an aching day for me..

my aunt brought me along to learn hw to sit a train or sth..

that wasn't that bad...

the worse thing was that i had to stand up for an HOUR!!!

what the...nobody wanted to let me sit...

these ppl...zzz...

so...later, when i'ce reached...i still had to walk to taylor's..

that took an hour...we walked under the hot blazing sun....gosh...

so sienz....but at least i did learn how to take a train about subang there lo...hahaha...

had a fun holiday....!!!

Cousins...

2009-12-20T19:21:00.000-08:00

wow.....what a night last night...

my other 2 cousins came back from Vietnam last night and we stayed over at my 3rd aunt's house!

we had a great time together...

we camwore together, making freaky and funny poses...

wanted to upload into the laptop but somehow the memory stick won't read it anymore...

very disappointing..and saddening...

partly cuz my memory stick is spoiled and i gotta go buy a new one and another is that our pics are all GONE!!!!

haiz...oh well...

but luckily we retook it again using Carol's laptop....XD

at least better than none right? XD

we chatted till very late at night...

wow....missed my cousins la...

sooooo long din see them le...

too bad i don't have any pics right now to post it up...

it's all in fb! XD

Finally Over

2009-12-15T00:38:00.000-08:00

is it really finally over?
yesterday was my last paper which was my one of my worst subject too...chinese.
oh man..it was so hard that i could have cried on the spot!!!

oh wells, at least that was over!! XD

right after i got my leaving sch cert, Hanee, Karen and i went to the SPRING!!! yay!!
for some reason why..my eyes were rather painful at that time. guess i was too tired...couldn't sleep at the previous night.
we walked and tried on clothes..mostly it was just Hnee and I la..XD
my legs were so tired that i wanted to fainted....hahahaha

soon..i had to prepare to go for out class party which was organised on that very night!
wow!! wad a day i had...tiring yet FUN!!!

i missed my friends so much...
reached home at 11 sth..talked to my cousin till 12 sth..then watched movie till 3 sth am..another day like this i'm gonna raise the white flag..XD

can't believe it for real that spm is really over..
5 whole years in SMK Kuching High and i'm alrady one of those ex highians.
i still cannot believe that fact.
just due to one important exam and i had to say goodbye to all my friends, to all my sweet and happy memories and also not doubt to those unpleasant ones too..XD

in another few weeks time...i'm gonna be an adult...
that'ts another thing that i still cannot quite believe it...

oh wells...guess i still just wanna be a kid...XD

cheers everybody!! ^^

done!!

2009-12-08T02:56:00.000-08:00

my chem is done for today!!!
for me..it's hard....haiz haiz haiz...

can't believe 5S2 finish today...they're now ex highian le...
unlike the rest of us...still highians...XD

i just can't wait for the day whereby we can all shout like wad Chern did at the end of the chem paper....our teacher nearly got a heart attack! XD

6 Down

2009-11-27T07:09:00.000-08:00

6 down and 5 more to go..
oh man..this is the 1st time i feel that exam is so dragging...

the time waiting for the paper to hurry come and go
and the time wishing that the paper won't come so soon
are really darn killing me...!!!

6 down and 5 more to go
five more....FIVE more!!

gosh man...i just can't stand this torture anymore...
wanna study can't study..
wanna on9 but feel guilty...
my feelings are just like mixfruit..
they are all jumbled up like "rojak".

oh well...night 'all..^^

Song of a Pig

2009-11-14T19:42:00.000-08:00

猪！你的鼻子有两个孔，感冒时的你还挂着鼻涕牛牛

Pig, there are two holes on your nose; when you catch a cold, you are snorting

猪！你有着黑漆漆的眼，望呀望呀望也看不到边

Pig, you have black eyes; look and look yet cannot see to the side

猪！你的耳朵是那么大，呼扇呼扇也听不到我在骂你傻

Pig, your ears are so large; yell and yell but they can't hear that I'm cursing you silly

猪！你的尾巴是卷又卷，原来跑跑跳跳，还离不开它

Pig, you have a curling tail; you run and jump and still can't escape it

猪头猪脑猪身猪尾巴

Pig head, pig brain, pig body and pig tail

从来不挑食的乖娃娃

You are a well-behaved baby that is never picky about food

每天睡到日晒三杆后

Every day you sleep until after noon

从不刷牙，从不打架

You never brush your teeth and you never fight

Lost Count

2009-11-13T06:17:00.000-08:00

right..
i've lost count of time...
what is the date today?
what is the time now?
how many days to SPM????!!!!

this is so ridiculous..
i'm still so not prepared yet and SPM is like...i dunno...few more days away?

today was the prize giving ceremony...tiring but i felt happy..
get to see my friends again..

to be honest...i missed my life as a MC in sch...=)

zzz

2009-10-28T08:56:00.000-07:00

can't believe i'm still blogging at this critical hour..
oh well...this just show how much i'm a computer addict...XD

don't wanna talk about spm...

life now is so boring...books books and books...
of course there's still tv and of ON9!!
hahahaha

wonder what will it be like without having to study....=)

anyways...night 'all...^^

Everytime We Touch lyrics

2009-10-08T06:54:00.000-07:00

Everytime We Touch

I still hear your voice, when you sleep next to me.
I still feel your touch in my dreams.(my dreams)
Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why
Without you it's hard to survive.

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
Need you by my side.
'Cause everytime we touch, I feel this static.
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky.
Can't you hear my heart beat slow...
I can't let you go.
Want you in my life.

Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky.
They wipe away tears that I cry. (I cry)
The good and the bad times, we've been through them all.
You make me rise when I fall.

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
Need you by my side.
'Cause everytime we touch, I feel this static.
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky.
Can't you hear my heart beat slow...
I can't let you go.
Want you in my life.

'Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I could fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
Need you by my side.

Succuss Quotes

2009-10-04T23:17:00.000-07:00

2nd Last Day

2009-10-02T06:35:00.000-07:00

finish my chem paper 1 and 2 today...

it was..one word to describe....BAD!!

paper one was still bearable...but..paper 2 essay...gosh!!!
it was unbelievable!!
so hard...i think i'm destined not to score well in sc subj..
i'm starting to have 2nd thoughts about going into a sc field in future..
kinda regretted going into the sc stream actually...

oh well, it's too late to regret now...spm is just like less than one month? gosh...

got back from church..
mass was like usual...

dad came back le...^^

Angels

2009-10-02T06:17:00.000-07:00

i just love this eyes...hahaha...

Angels..

I sit and wait

does an angel contemplate my fate
and do they know
the places where we go
when we’re grey and old
‘cos I’ve been told
that salvation lets their wings unfold
so when I’m lying in my bed
thoughts running through my head
and I feel that love is dead
I’m loving angels instead

and through it all she offers me protection
a lot of love and affection
whether I’m right or wrong
and down the waterfall
wherever it may take me
I know that life wont break me
when I come to call she wont forsake me
I’m loving angels instead

when I’m feeling weak
and my pain walks down a one way street
I look above
and I know ill always be blessed with love
and as the feeling grows
she breathes flesh to my bones
and when love is dead
I’m loving angels instead

Done With Bio!

2009-09-28T23:09:00.000-07:00

Finally!!

Biology paper down!!!!
now gotta prepare to face physic for tomorrow...

i'm so gonna be crazy...

Less Than 6 Hours

2009-09-27T07:34:00.000-07:00

Less than 6 hours starting from now..
i'll have to face Bio trial paper 1 and paper 2 tomorrow..

ish...this is just to tensing and ridiculous..
tense in the way that..oh come on..exam ma..
ridiculous is cuz i'm still spending my precious time updating my dead blog..

ridiculous huh..

oh well..

i gotta go have my beauty sleep..

nights..

^^

hahaha..

2009-09-23T01:13:00.000-07:00

i went jogging in Taman Sahabat yesterday..
kinda late to post but it was so funny..hahahaha..

i went jogging or it was kinda of more like walking..haha..
tired so i rested..then a girl went past me shouting out loud in a girly snobbish way,

"How am I supposed to get thin???!!!!"

it somehow triggered my nerves and i snorted out laughing..
the girl heard me and she cast me a look..
haha..that made me laughed louder...my bro laughed with me too, making the whole situation worse for the girl..XD

later, she showed us her fist and stuck out her tongue.
in a way, she looked so childish and cute la...hahahaha...

=D